@postaday 142; #postaday2011.
“Aloha! This is Paula Bender. If you’re looking for someone else, SORRY! This is my number now.”
When I got my new iPhone4 back in March, I also got a new Verizon telephone number. I don’t blame Verizon. How would they know? Maybe when a telephone number is disconnected, it should stay dormant for a 90-day period so new phone number owners like me don’t have to clean up the slop left by their former owners. 
Apparently, this number belonged to a guy named Daniel. Apparently, Daniel was into retail recreational pharmaceuticals. Apparently, Daniel was into it 24/7. How do I know? Apparently, Daniel did not leave a forwarding number.
I don’t work for Daniel, but it feels like I do. I get calls and text messages all the time for Daniel. It’s annoying. I’d like it to stop. I would like all of Daniel’s friends to stop trying to reach him. He’s gone. I have no idea where he is. I do not know if he is in the witness protection program, has amnesia, fell off a boat, moved to Costa Rica, or is in prison.
It’s true, I really do not know whether these people reaching out to Daniel are looking for drugs. Maybe they miss him. Maybe they just wanna hang out, shoot some pool, or down a few beers. I don’t know if Daniel is into guys or into girls. The text all have a ‘boy feel’ to them if you ask me. I could be wrong. He might be a psychoanalyst available to those in distress. When my phone rang last night at about 12:20 a.m., John answered it. He thought that might help put some teeth into the “this isn’t Daniel’s number anymore” message. 
Let’s agree that people who call each other at 12:20 a.m. are basically dumb shits and leave it at that. And, yes, those are the phone numbers these calls came from.
Please hang up and try again.
Lavagal 
Paula: When I first got an iPhone I had the former number of a parent of a student at Waipahu High School. He wasn’t a good student, so after the third call from the VP, I said, “Tell him I said that he better start paying attention in school, otherwise I’m coming down there…and this isn’t his mother.” — never got a call again 🙂
I had something similar happen. I live in a complex of 2 apartment buildings, with the same apartment numbers in the north and south building. I live in #2203-South. Maybe Daniel once lived in #2203-North, because people would knock at all hours of the night.
I’m sad the people who wanted pizza stopped calling our land line number. I was trying to figure out how to turn that into some spare cash. But at least they confined the calls to business hours. Then again, maybe Daniel had flexible business hours. Criper then the lambs bread!
We’re one of the few that still have a landline. Have been with the number for the past 9 years and I still get calls from people making appointments to the dentist or canceling the appointments. (Those I try to call back and so they don’t get charged!)
You should direct them all to “meet up” in a police parking lot or some big evangelical conference!
I don’t have to approve all comments to my blog, just an FYI.
LOL. Love your “just bought a swimsuit” answer. Our landline is similar to Physician’s Exchange, so we get calls at ungodly hours, too.
daniel’s callers have something in common with just about every wrong number caller i can remember in the past several years: they’re rude. when i call a wrong number, i apologize to the recipient before disconnecting. if it’s after hours, i apologize with extra feeling. the one of daniel’s pals who i spoke to cursed and hung up. are more people rude and angry nowadays? it seems so.