I am in a funk. Ask my husband. I am so in a funk. The weather in Hawaii is a bit tinged around the edges. The trade winds have ceased, allowing the vog to float in from the south upon gentle kona breezes. It will give people runny noses and sneezing fits and headaches.
Not sure what my personal funk is about. It could be the weather. It could be the way I seem to be brushed off every time I reach out to someone. Maybe it’s wondering too much. I know my little aches and pains are big enough to scare me.
On days like this I am happy to be at work where the climate is controlled. That’s about all though. The work load is dynamic and the managers are talking into two phones at once, answering texts and emails, shoving crunchy snacks into their faces because they don’t have time to eat a real meal. We do love our deadlines, and we do love our pressure, but we also love it when the juices flow in our brains well and our efforts trigger the chorus of angels across the hall.
We don’t always, so we go back to the drawing board.
At work today we said good bye to a fellow writer, Andrea, and her husband Mel, who worked on our web team. Same department, different units. They got married last summer. When they announced their engagement, many of us who worked among them didn’t even know they had dated. At department meetings they never sat together. Each of them is really quiet compared to people like me! And Andrea’s even from South Jersey where everybody is loud all the time! When did they even have a conversation, let alone date, let alone get engaged, and then get married?
As another colleague serenaded the couple with his ukulele, singing two songs including “Over the Rainbow,” ala Israel “IZ” Kamakawiwoole, I took a photo and then ran over to the other side of the wall to my cube where I just dabbed my eyes until he was done. THEN I got to blow my nose. What the heck? I think my hormones might be part of this emotional symphony as well. Sometimes listening to Iz helps:
I do like kona weather for weekend bicycle rides and it might mean I’ll get in a stand-up paddle board session on the beach. My girls would love that. It’s time for the weekend. I’m going to find a way to scrub out the negatives, the doubt, and the insecurities that sprout up when I feel alone. Does merlot go with guacamole? Time to turn this funk into fun!