You Are Here


You know how when you go to some place new, like a shopping mall or an amusement park or a zoo or a high-rise office tower clutching your resume in hand, you automatically search for the lighted sign that’s a directory slash legend slash map — a device that so graciously shows you, usually with a big red dot, “YOU ARE HERE?”

Sweet Pursuit.

Here’s something else to think about. Ever tease a kitty with a laser pointer? Yes, it’s hilarious, the kitty is game most of the time, but even when they catch the spot, they never really quite catch the spot.

Sometimes I feel like I’m never exactly at the spot, my personal YOU ARE HERE spot, that place where I’m supposed to be. When I’m on my bike, I should be cresting that distant hill. When I’m swimming, I’m wishing I were toweling off. When I’m running, I’m wishing I was walking it off. When I’m with others, I long to be alone. When I’m standing at the stove, I’m longing to be at the table, eating with my family. When I’m frustrated, I want resolution. When I have a project, I want it complete, and I want to deliver it with a certain amount of wow factor wrapped into it.

I feel this with people, too. Can we be friends? Is this too much trouble? Does their interest mirror mine? Sometimes I even feel this with my children. I wonder. Feelings slip away like sand in our fingers. Sometimes I have to tell myself that a particular moment cannot be relived, and all I have left to savor is the memory. After a while you realize the memory is embellished or tarnished, no longer exact.

As a result, you are never really here because life is a journey, and as we continue to breathe, we become more than we were a moment ago.

 

 

lavagal's avatar

By lavagal

Hawaii Kai wife and mom. Melanoma Stage 3a Cancer survivor. English Language Arts teacher, English Learners Coordinator, and Paraprofessional Tutor. Super sub teacher. Dormant triathlete. Road cyclist and Masters swimmer. Gardener. Mrs. Fixit. Random dancer. Music Curator. A teenager trapped in an aging body. Did you know 60 is the new 40? It is.

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