Soon word got out that HuffPost Hawaii was looking for bloggers. I thought that maybe lavagal.net would be worthy of such a great opportunity. Maybe I could finally cash in on my words. Since I began the blog in 2008 I’ve accumulated a lot of subscribers, it gets plenty of hits each week, and some people actually share my blog! That’s all very gratifying. I can look at a map of my hits and see that people from all over the globe have found lavagal.net. They might be looking for something to do with Hawaii, a recipe, something to do with triathlons or motherhood, or maybe they want to know about the darker subjects I’ve covered such as that period where I felt like my phone number previously belonged to a drug dealer.

With a few emails I managed to get my blog before Patti Epler, the editor at Civil Beat. Patti responded, said she liked my content there and said that HuffPost Hawaii could definitely use the blog for the site, which will be live in September. She attached the guidelines to her email and I told her I’d be back in touch after I checked them out.

So here’s the nail in my “I’ll-never-write-in-this-town-again coffin,” which is a drag because I do believe I would be a great writer for some outfit here in Honolulu. The HuffPost Hawaii guidelines say:

“…You don’t get paid, but you get access to our highly engaged audience and a forum to share your views and express your opinions and ideas. You also get exposure, so promote yourself!…”

Well, shoots. I already don’t pay myself for writing lavagal.net. I get engagement, I post updates to Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn. I do get pitches for ads on my site and maybe I should start considering them. But here’s the thing about lavagal.net: It’s purely me, it’s fun, it goes in any direction I want it to take, it gives you something to think about, it makes some people happy, it makes some people laugh, and it makes some people mad. And since I pay the annual fee I get to decide what comments are public and I make sure the spam about erection direction or secret love cam links never surface.

What’s the deal HuffPost Hawaii?

• Does any working journalist think that anyone should contribute content anywhere for free?
• Does any ethical journalist think it is OK to suggest that writing at no charge for exposure and writing without pay for the glory of a byline and writing for free just to get experience is legitimate?
• If you are no longer a college student or beyond considering an internship, and if you are raising a family like me, writing isn’t for fun, it’s for fuel and profit.

As we see what bloggers decided to sign on to the HuffPost Hawaii gravyless train, keep in mind that not a single one of them will be paid. And keep in mind that not a single one of them has any self esteem.

Here was my response: 

Patti:

I would need tangible compensation in order to participate. I’m worth more than zero, and I do believe journalists and bloggers shouldn’t allow themselves to be used for the privilege of gaining national exposure. If you like me and my site enough to pay for it, then I’d be happy to discuss.

I’m disappointed, but I know I made the right decision. Pass the Cup Noodles, children.

The day before the race John shot a photo of me with the Ironman rocks at the entrance of the Fairmont Orchid Hotel. Eager and anxious.

I was reminded the day before this race that a year ago I blogged about having Honu Envy while I watched online as my TryFitness teammates complete the Honu half Ironman triathlon on the Big Island. I was thrilled for them as I watched their times update, and I was sad for those who didn’t make the cutoff as each leg of the event concluded.

Having worked out with these women for quite a while, I knew of their strengths and weaknesses, drives and doubts, and the commitment to themselves while pursuing careers, raising families, and keeping up with meals, chores, laundry, children’s performances, and teacher and doctor appointments. Life is full, so of course we should do more.

The Red Firecracker at rest in the rack, the day before.

Fast forward to early 2013 and I get a chance to make this desire a reality. On Sundays, Tuesdays and Thursdays we met for our group workouts. The schedule also had assignments on the other days of the week, too. Usually we got a break on Monday, and maybe another on Friday. We didn’t necessarily have to do those workouts on the days we weren’t with the group, but if we wanted to be our best, they were heavily advised. Hint. Hint. They would be a swim, a run, a ride, some isometrics and ab workouts, or a combination. The schedule, refined over the years by our mentor and coach, Kristin “KC” Carlberg, is designed to deliver each of us to the best we can be on the morning of our event.

We visited the bay at Hapuna Beach State Park the day after the race. What a gorgeous place.

So last Saturday on June 1, I finally got my turn at Honu. I had eight and a half hours to complete the 1.2-mile swim, the 56-mile bike ride, and the 13.1-mile run. My swim was about 48 minutes, my bike ride was 03:38:51, and my run, which is my weakest side of the triathlon triangle, was 03:32:07. The full event, including transition from swim to bike and transition from bike to run, took me 08:12:25. They turned out the lights at 08:30:00, so I was thrilled to make the cut.

Oh, it’s just some bracelet I got for being an athlete.

I was also thrilled to know that I would be worthy of wearing the logo wear I had purchased  at the event expo, LOL.

Your mileage, your experience, may vary. But here’s how this works for me. Sure, I’m competitive, but I’m realistic enough to know my limitations. I’m in my mid 50s, and let me assure you this does not mean you’ve got one foot in the grave. I do have a few maladies to contend with: Left leg plantar fasciitis. Right leg persistent knee problems thanks to the full Achilles tendon burst in 2010. And emotionally, I can be riddled with all kinds of negativity. Until this event I realized how easily I was giving bullies permission to diminish my accomplishments and to plant doubts into my psyche. For the past few years my husband has been doing his best to help me get through this emotional cesspool. During these last few months Coach KC had also taken me aside to help fortify my mental game and to help me realize that I should know in my own soul how I can achieve this and that I am worthy.

In my first triathlon, the Lanikai Triathlon in 2012, I panicked in the water. A squall had passed through and the ocean was churning. Throw several hundred triathletes in the water and it can get overwhelming. I wanted to slip under the water and never come back up. Of course, I sure as hellas do not want to miss out on what a great life is in store for me and my family. I pulled myself together and got out of the water. It was a slow race for me, but I finished and I was so proud.

For the Honu swim, I felt good. I stayed back a little bit at the start to avoid the thrashing, but then I managed to work my way through at my own pace with just a few minor punches and grabs. When I got out of the water, I was really stoked about my time. John, KC, and my teammates cheered me through to transition where I became a bicyclist.

The workouts up Pineapple Hill, Sierra Heights Drive, Kilauea Avenue, Kamiloiki, “Heartbreak Hill,” and Makapu’u, paid off in spades as I climbed the Big Island’s Kohala coast toward Hawi. The persistent winds for the last few months meant that I’d be able to withstand the headwind that resisted our efforts all the way back toward the second transition. When I saw the cones directing the bicyclists toward the Fairmont Orchid, I came to tears because I was so happy to be almost done with the ride. As I was racking my bike, a young man passed me draped in maile lei. It was the overall winner, Craig Alexander. I said, “You’re done and I’m just starting my run!” He took my hand gave it a squeeze and said, “You can do it!” And of course I could.

I slid into my running shoes, had the sense to put on my visor and change my sunglasses, put on some lip balm, forgot my belly bag and my gels, and gingerly started my run as I was  still on my rubbery bicycle legs. Our team’s support crew and my coach cheered me on as I took off. KC asked how my legs were and I told her I couldn’t even feel them. I was so charged, I was so happy, I knew I could complete the 13.1-run in less than the three and a half hours that were left on my clock. Other people can do that run in remarkable times, but it’s not easy for me. As I was running through the lava fields, over the golf course, under roads and through tunnels, I thought how it would be great if I could finish this triathlon in less time than it took me to do the Honolulu Marathon in December (08:10:25). Dang, I missed it by two minutes. As I approached the finish, I could see the clock was already at 08:22 and counting. We would deduct 10 minutes from the clock because the women’s start was that much behind the pros earlier that day when the whole shebang begun.

I’ll take 08:12:25 for my first 70.3 Ironman.

Honestly, I didn’t think I’d want to do it again. When I was done, I was so happy that I danced to the music while waiting for my finisher T-shirt, hat, and medal. I wiggled while waiting for my free beer and cheeseburger. I giggled while I ate solid food for the first time in like 20 hours. My husband was so relieved and was as happy as I was. He used that long lens on his camera to spy me on my final approach and I could see from a 1/4 mile away that he was as happy as me.

So, yes, I’m going to do it again next year and bring our daughters along because we missed them so much while we were enjoying the beauty of the Big Island.

Last night was the TryFitness Honu 70.3 last workout. We swam (I did 1.01 miles at 37 minutes or so), and then the rest of the gals did some sprints while I nursed my two leg injuries. I’m saving myself for my virginal half tri and will run great guns Saturday morning.

My coach KC Carlberg asked me what my mantra for the race. I drew a blank. Yvette, who completed it last year, said hers was, “My race, my pace.” So that’s a good one. It’s all about positives and I’ll need plenty!

I am staying in a condo with three of my teammates pretty close to all the action. We’re hosting the carbo loading dinner Thursday evening, and will be attending all the pre-race events — required and desired — to store in our noggins every little thing we need to know. And of course there will be the Ironman store, the bike tech shop (I might need help with my pedals!), and the Costco run for the condo.

If I cross your mind on Saturday, please send your encouraging thoughts my way. I am about to realize a dream, I’m amazed that I get to do this, and I hope my swim and bike are fast enough that I’ve enough in the bank to complete the 13.1 mile run in time.